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Should, can, will: how your speech can determine success rates.

Should, can, will: how your speech can determine success rates.

You just met three potential candidates that you are looking to hire as your personal body guard.  Let us just say things have gotten hairy, and you have had some serious threats made against you, and so for your own safety you will be provided a personal bodyguard at no expense to yourself.

All three candidates are of past military background, they are all in great shape, they are all battle tested and reliable, but they all differ in the ways they answered one question on your application packet.

The question: “How well will you be able to protect me from any harm that may be coming my way?.  The three answers were: “I should be able to protect you from any harm that comes your way.”, “I can protect you from anyone or anything looking to harm you.”, and finally “I will keep you safe, no matter what comes your way.”

With your own life on the line, which person are you going to trust to take care of your wellbeing and protect you from harm?

 

Our speech says a lot about what we believe and how committed we are to something.

While the words should/could, can/able, and will are often used interchangeably, they mean very different things. The person who is still saying I should be doing this or that, simply isn’t going to do it. The person who says I can or I am able to do that may believe that they can do it, but they aren’t going to do it. But, the person who says I am going to do it, or I will do it, that’s the person who is going to get shit done.

 

When it comes right down to it, there are three major types of people in the world: there are the people that want it to happen, the people who try to make it happen, and the people who actually make it happen. (and of course, there are the people who just want to hate on everybody else because they have already given up on themselves).

 

The vast majority of people in the world fall into the “I want to make it happen category”.  

We all know someone who knows they need to or should: lose weight, eat better, treat their lover better, get more organized, go back to school, or get a better job, but they don’t. It isn’t that they can’t do it, they just won’t.

The saddest thing is that most people know that they SHOULD be doing something, and that knowledge just sits there in the back of their mind gnawing at them for their entire life, until one day it becomes too late, and then they wish that they would have done it.

“Should do it” will one day turn into “I wish I would have done it.”

It might be on your deathbed, it might be when your car gets repossessed or you get fried from your job, it might happen when you are too overweight to even move more than a few steps or you get diagnosed with diabetes, but you better believe that all those things that you tell yourself that you should be doing, are going to turn into regrets someday and that is the sad reality for about 95% of the people on this planet. Most people will stay stuck in could and should for their entire life, and then one day, they will die- along with all of their could have, should have, would haves.

 

Next there are the people who try to make it happen.

The people who try to make it happen make plans, they take action, and they believe it is possible to do it, but deep down they are really just trying to make it happen, they aren’t actually making it happen.

The people who try and make it happen put in some effort, they try to be better, they believe in the impossible, but they still have that room for failure in the back of their mind: they still think it’s ok to fail.

People who try might spend a lot of time researching how to do something, they might read books or take lessons, they might even experiment with trying new things or blazing a new path, but they lack that killer instinct to make things happen, instead they wait for things to come their way instead.

I used to fall into this category, and I still find myself here from time to time in different aspects; sometimes I grind today and wait for tomorrow, I think to myself “It is going to happen when the time is right”, but sometimes you just have to be the guy or girl who stops waiting for it to happen, and just makes it happen.

The people who try to make it happen say “I can.”, “I could.”, “It is possible.” “I will learn.”

The people who try to make it happen often end up becoming the person who makes it happen, because they learn enough to finally break through and do it, and sometimes they just try to do it and they get lucky and do it. It is certainly better to try than to not try at all, but it’s even better to just be the person that does it.

 

And finally, there are the people who make it happen.

The people who make it happen are the people who don’t have failure as an option; they are the people who have no plan b, they have no escape route or safety net, and the one path ahead of them is the path of success.

The people who make it happen are the people who don’t speak with any doubt, they have conviction in everything they say. They say things like “I will do it.”, “I am doing it.”, or a lot of times they are just saying “I did it.”.

The people who make it happen, don’t always succeed exactly as planned, but they are going to end up way better off than they started, because they sure as hell aren’t going back to the where they started.

 

The next time you find yourself thinking or talking about what you could do, or should do, stop yourself and say “I will do it”, and then do it.

The only way you are ever going to do anything is just to do it.

Talking about it isn’t going to get it done, thinking about it isn’t going to get it done, and wishing it would happen isn’t going to get it done; the only way to get it done is to do it. It doesn’t matter if you know how, it doesn’t matter if you think you can do it, just do it.  If you do it, and if you refuse to accept defeat, you are GOING to do it.

So either do it or shut up.

I’m sorry- but not sorry- to be harsh, because that is what you need to hear. The truth is the things you are waiting to start tomorrow are never going to get done without a lot of willpower and discipline, and the only way you can develop willpower and discipline, is by getting things done.

So do it or die with the regret of not doing it.


What do you need to do?  Leave a comment below and put it out there, maybe someone else can offer the words of encouragement to get you started.  What do you think? Have any other tips? Give the article a share if you know someone else who could use this motivational talk to get started in their own life.

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