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25 simple things that you can do to boost your relationship today

When it comes to the one’s we love, it is easy to neglect them and forget about our relationships. We have to make relationships a priority if we want them to last for years. Part of why people used to stay married for 50+ years is because they understood that even though you might love someone very much, it takes a lot of work to keep it going. Love is like a fire from a lightning strike, it starts suddenly, spectacularly, and it’s totally random and out of your control; it starts as a small fire that can turn into an inferno as you start investing more love and effort into the relationship, but as you get used to the warmth of the fire you gradually stop tending it, until one day your love has reduced into nothing but an ember and it dies. If you want to keep your love alive, try any of these 25 things to help your relationship today.   Say “I love you” like you mean it. All of us have mumbled “I love you” as we walked out the door to work or headed off to go do something, but when was the last time you really said I love you to someone? Try telling your lover how much you love them, what it feels like, how they make your heart feel, or how valuable they are to you. Don’t just tell them you love them, but really think about what life would be like without them and tell them why you love them.   Take a walk Go for a walk together,... read more

10 things you should definitely know about love

These days it seems like love has given up on mankind. The divorce rate is soaring up over 50%, marriage’s average life-span shortens each day, and our world is full of jaded people with closed off hearts, but there is still that little sparkle in the eye of the person you love and you are going to go for it anyway. Good for you! But, you need to know a few things about love. Whether you are 35 and recently divorced or 19 and in love for the first time, love is and will be an incredibly challenging event. Most of the people you talk to who were married for 60 years will tell you the secret is hard work, love, or a combination of the two. So what lessons do you need to learn before you hop onto the roller coaster that we call love?   Love takes courage Love might be one of the scariest things that you can possibly embark upon. I know that I have competed in MMA, fought all over the country in martial arts competitions, quit my job to move across the country for a new possibility, started several blogs, and lots of other crazy things, but by far, the craziest and most vulnerable I have ever felt has been in love. Loving someone takes a level of vulnerability that many of us just don’t feel capable of, and while it can be scary, if you want to bask in the glory of love, you are going to have to risk getting burned. If you can’t open up to the possibility of harm,... read more

8 daily habits that can steal the happiness from your relationship

We all have habits, you know, those little things that we do each day; most of them aren’t chosen habits, but they get formed out of comfort and convenience, but many of these habits end up actually taking away our happiness and limiting the lives that we enjoy. Some of our daily habits can even be a drain on the relationships that we love and cherish as well. Look out for these 8 happiness draining habits in your own relationship, and if you look hard enough, I bet you will find at least a few!   Nitpicking Nitpicking is an easy habit trap to fall into, we get home and the first thing we see are all of the things that are wrong with our life and our world. Nitpicking is easy with the people we love, because we feel so comfortable with them, we want to tell them everything we see wrong. “I hate when you do that.”, “Couldn’t you do that outside.”, “Why do I even make a monthly budget if you are going to spend whatever you want anyway?”… and nag and nag and nag. Men, don’t think you are off the hook, because men nag too, it may not be as common, but we definitely do our own fair share of nagging and nitpicking as well. Throw this habit where it belongs: in the garbage.   Complaining Complaining is a lot like nitpicking, but it is less directed at another person and just some sort of negative observation of the world around you. “It stinks in here.”, “I hate traffic.”, “This guy at work drives... read more

Work together in your relationships to compound mutual love and respect

Remember that old saying that it takes two to tango? Well it takes two people for a relationship as well, and even though that may sound ridiculous to you, a lot of people seem to miss this simple truth in their own relationships. You may be reading these words, even now, and be thinking to yourself that you are always giving in, that you are always compromising and that your partner is a selfish slob, but the truth is probably not as simple as you would like to make it. Working together is what makes a relationship reach its highest potentials, after all, one of the greatest benefits of a great relationship is the special bond that comes from two people working together for a single unified cause. That is synergy: when the sum of two or more separate parts come together to produce an effect that is greater than what either of the two separate parts could create on their own. When you and your partner are united, when you look out for their wants and needs just as much, or even more, than you look out for your own, then that’s synergy. So do you want to learn how to work together better with your partner and make a relationship that is truly great? It all starts with building that two person team.   Put their desires before you own (or at least on equal ground) If you want to truly build a relationship where both people work together, you are going to have to do your best to watch out for the needs and wants of... read more

How to end insecurity in your relationship forever

Insecurity usually comes from one place: somewhere inside of you. Different things can cause us to feel insecure: things from the past, a lack of confidence in ourselves, a lack of trust, and other issues can contribute as well. Insecurity is a big drain on relationships, not just on the person who has the feelings of insecurity, but also on the other person as well. While many things can cause insecurity, it will usually feel like a lack of trust to your partner, and people who don’t feel trusted often feel less motivated to invest emotionally into relationships. There are some ways that you can overcome insecurity, and there are many exercises and books that can aid you in this, but it all starts with confidence, because most insecurity stems from some sort of inferiority complex that you have.   Learn to love yourself first Most insecurity comes from a lack of self love or self esteem. People who are insecure tend to see themselves as unworthy of love and affection, and because of this feeling, they often project the same feelings onto others around them. Quite simply, if you don’t love yourself and if you can’t see any reasons to love yourself, then you will have a hard time imagining why someone else would love or hold affection for you as well. Learning to love yourself often involves painful introspection and self examination; you must be able to identify where your feelings of inadequacy stem from. Sometimes a lack of self esteem comes from physical or mental abuse from others, a lack of a relationship with your parents,... read more

How to add value into a realtionship: the economics of love.

In a world full of constant taking, many of us live with a ““What can the world do for me?” attitude, and while that may work for some things, it certainly won’t work for very long in a relationship. It is sort of natural for us to get used to things, and even those of us lucky enough to be in great relationships are often guilty of growing complacent and neglecting to contribute value back into our relationships and our lover’s life. So how can we keep a relationship alive, help keep our partners happy, and most of all, how can we challenge our partner to grow while simultaneously accepting our own opportunity to grow as a person?   A relationship is a lot like a bank… When you first get into a relationship it’s like opening a new account, since you don’t know each other very well, there is very little invested into the account of your love. It just takes that first initial deposit to get started, but we all know it takes more to really build a bank account. Every kind deed or word, every kiss, every fond memory and smile, they all add up in your relationships combined account, and every malicious word or look, every dirty look and bad memory all withdraw from it. In the beginning, we are afraid to lose our initial investment, so we start making deposits constantly. We usually start being our best self, we are kinder than we normally are, more positive than we normally are, more spontaneous and alive than we usually are, and then we eventually feel... read more

Equal exchange: why you should give as much as you take.

“Ask not what your lover can do for you, ask what you can do for your lover.” In many relationships, people evolve into a place of strictly talking, they stop thinking about what they can do for their partner, and start focusing solely on what their partner should be doing for them. We are all guilty of it, and there are certainly cycles in relationships of give and take, but striving to create a balance between both partners between give and take is the very best way to preserve an overall sense of wellbeing and happiness for both people. I want to help you see that there are benefits in both giving, and benefits in receiving, and ensuring that both partners stay invested and feeling appreciated is a big key in long term relationship success.   The benefits of giving. Most of us have been told it is better to give than to receive, and the benefits of giving are fairly well known throughout the world, yet in practice, many of us neglect our own personal responsibility in our relationships. Giving more to our partners, whether giving gifts, affection, appreciation, favors, adoration, an ear to listen, or just our presence when it is needed are all vital components to a healthy relationship. When we give more in a relationship, it makes our partner feel loved, appreciated, respected, and important. So when we give more, our partner experiences more feelings of love from us. Our partner cannot feel our love, no matter how strongly we feel it, and the only way to help them experience the love we feel for... read more

The 25 greatest quotes about love.

“You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching, Love like you’ll never be hurt, Sing like there’s nobody listening, And live like it’s heaven on earth.” ― William W. Purkey   “You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” ― Dr. Seuss   “A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.” ― Elbert Hubbard   “We accept the love we think we deserve.” ― Stephen Chbosky   “It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche   “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” ― Lao Tzu   “Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” ― Robert A. Heinlein,   “I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts and I’ve led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough..” ― Nicholas Sparks   “Love is like the wind, you can’t see it but you can feel it.” ― Nicholas Sparks   “You don’t love someone because they’re perfect, you love them in spite of the fact that they’re not.” ― Jodi Picoult   “When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.” ― Paulo... read more

Are your current relationship problems your fault?

I want to apologize to you first things, because the title of this post was a little misleading.   This how to guide is actually a trick, because if there is something wrong in your relationship then you are most definitely at fault in some way.   Either you aren’t living up to your own standards, you aren’t respecting yourself to not be with a certain type of person, or you aren’t doing all of the things that you should be doing to make your relationship better.   If you even have to wonder if you are responsible for your relationship troubles, then you most certainly are in a way, but before you leave a nasty comment, read the post and then you can tell me if you still hate me at the end.   Relationships are a two way street.   That means it takes effort from two people in order to make a relationship work.  Now that being said, there are also going to be problems that arise and they are going to come from both people as well.   It is important to note, the only wrong things in a relationship are the things that both of you have sat down and mutually agreed are wrong.   So if you think being messy is wrong, but your partner doesn’t see messiness as a problem, then guess what?  It is not wrong, but if you both talk about it and agree that being messy is wrong, yet they make a mess anyway, then you might have a problem.   So what have we established so far?  It... read more

8 lessons EVERY woman should know to please ANY man.

Everybody knows that women and men seem to speak a different language sometimes, in fact, at times it seems like men and women are different species…from different planets, from alternate universes.   I know I have struggled at times to understand the female mind, and I am sure many females out there have struggled to understand the male mind as well.  This article is dedicated to the women out there, and I am writing this article to give you the best insight I know how to give you based  upon being a man and interacting with other men.   While none of these rules are 100% true all of the time, you will generally find all of these facts are true most of the time, and you will find them quite helpful next time you are staring at your guy and wondering what language he is speaking.   Men tend to think in problems and solutions, not in emotions and interactions.   Let’s say you just came home from a long day at work and you got into an argument with a female co-worker about something at work.  You go to your man to tell him about the argument and you go into detail about your co-workers body language, the snarky way she reacted to what you said, and even about what Jennifer from accounting said this woman said about you the other day.   When you finish your story, instead of relating to you and telling you how wrong your co-worker is, he starts asking you questions like “Well how did you respond?” or, “How does Jennifer from... read more



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